Well-Hung "PerfecTONE" guitar strap, 3" wide Prototype w/Aural Excitement circuit, BlackBird

You've been seeking it, I've been seeking it, even your heroes seeking it every darn day. Perfect Sweet Guitar Tone.

Crystal lattice, haunting mids, harmonic complexity, sag and bloom, we all hear it all up in our head, but just where does this great tone hide, and why won't it come out to play? All manner of pedals, amps, pickups, strings, picks, the faces we make, our fingers, fretboards, nuts... all these elements can contribute to coaxing, often cannibalizing our tone.  Why is it so nearly impossible to find perfect lasting aural pleasure just the way we like it, any time we feel we need it? 

Impossible until today, and this new exciting game-changing breakthrough! Mark this day as a day in guitar history forever. The PerfecTONE guitar strap. Now for real, let it be declared that the tone.... is in... the STRAP!

Finally, after months, nay years of experimentation, Well-Hung Guitar Accessories has finally captured and bottled elusive wavelets of pleasuretone. We then created an accurate replication device and mated it to a deceptively simple-looking guitar strap.

The Well-Hung Aural Excitement Tone Circuit was hoped to finally bring quality straptone to the masses, though the cost of the rare earth metals make this highly unlikely. Our first version was the size of a small desk. The second was nearer a lunchbox. Due to emerging nanotech improvements, we can now house our tone replicator in a small vacuum-sealed chamber, and for the first time ever in the history of tonal pursuit, securely incorporated it into a Well-Hung guitar strap. P-90's, single coils,  even toneless humbuckers or active pickups may all benefit greatly from this circuit. Some around the lab swear it even works on acoustic guitar tones, but still much more testing is required to confirm this assertation.* 

Simply put this strap on your electric guitar, plug into and turn on your favourite amp, and begin playing to dial it in. A single easy-to-use control on the inside of the strap helps you find your tonal sweet spot. It is 100% adaptive for each particular guitar. Close your eyes and imagine the tone, You will know when you find it. Watch the hyper-red LED ToneBeacon light up intermittently showing you your tone requires an extra sonorous replicator push towards ascendant-to-the-throne tone. It may only have a shine on when it is working, but we find it is far more useful when not lit 100% of the time - just kicking in when required. Itchy goosbumps, panic attacks, unwanted involuntary excretions, sudden hair loss, drooling and/or cottonmouth often result with too much tone. Remember, with great tone comes great responsibility. Please use the Well-Hung Aural Exciter like you would a seasoning. A little is enough, too much will ruin the dish. 

We considered posting audio. However, your awful speakers would not do this device justice. Plus, even the joy of a million giggling angel babies cannot shine through the grisly death rattle of internet compression. So, we said no. 

This is a one-of-a-kind prototype. A 3" wide luxuriously padded strap, built of faux black ostrich with velvety grippy inside lining. Heavy harness leather ends front and back. So, not just tonal pleasure, but physical pleasure as well, as the PerfecTONE prototype is lushly padded in the shoulder. If you are new to Well-Hung guitar straps, you will find it like no other strap you've worn.  Long rehearsals made short, difficult gigs become a breeze.  You will play longer, better and happier with this simple addition to your gear stable. Even if you still can't find your tone.

And, along with the expected massive comfort, now purity of tone is onboard, such as yet-to-be harnessed by any other guitar strap manufacturer big or small: the Aural Exciter circuit in this beautiful PerfecTONE guitar strap by Well-Hung. Notice along the strap a ribbon of embroidered skulls and crossbones. We chose this specifically,  carefully placed it to remind the user of the dangers of harnessing and outputting too much great tone. The threat is real, any and all tonal abuse is by your own risk, we cannot be held responsible. Also, this strap adjusts between 46"-58" which will satisfy most low-hanging rockers and posers.

((( Crafted this as an April Fools' joke 2021.  I yield the massive tonal improvements heard when engaging the Aural Excitement circuit of various guitars with this strap installed, may possibly be mostly due to a placebo effect ))).

Well-Hung slings are handmade by me, I am not a factory or a robot, I am a guitar-playing brother, so I fully get it. It's a walmart pie v.s. grandma pie thing. Craft, love and quality ingredients are involved in the making here. This is a long lasting strap you will probably treasure. Not every strap of this line is identical, but very similar. Long, strong, sexy, and different from any other strap you've tried. Customers repeat.

Please recon my feedback for my level of quality and how I treat my customers.  My customer-friends tell the tale better than I can. We look forward to you joining the Cult of the Well-Hung guitar real soon. I'm also inclined to often put extra stuffs in my package, makes a lotta customers extra happy. Please Note that if you wish to make me an offer, go right ahead... I may accept, but NO SWAG FOR YOU!  And you want the swag, don't you? Also, when you leave feedback for me, I'll take as many stars as you can give, but PLEASE SAY A FEW WORDS so others get an idea of the Well-Hung out-of-box experience. It's extremely important for my survival against yuuuge multinational conglomerates who probably want to take me out back and beat me up a little bit.

Hey, there's cool stuff to see on the Well-Hung Facebook page, strapmakin' videos and pics of your strap brothers. Go see, like, subscribe and share with all your friends. Plus you'll often get to see the cool stuff being made before it arrives in the Reverb Shop.

*Tone is subjective. You or your audience may or may not hear any audible or measurable difference arising from use of the PerfecTONE strap. YMMV. The longer and harder you practice, the better your tone will get, guaranteed. ;-) 

My 'merican brothers, your shipping cost is higher. For months I’ve been struggling on how to re-open my store for your market. Only way I could is to add US-imposed duty to your shipping price, plus a small bump to facilitate me pre-paying it via the Zonos app before I am allowed to ship. Here's how it goes down: Only after I ship your purchase, Reverb pays me. I cannot ship until all duties are pre-paid. I've added this extra cost to your shipping to reimburse me for paying your duty in advance. It’s the only way I can ship. This is NOT extra profit for me, but a carefully calculated expense. Your government levies tariffs and duty as a sort of import tax on imports, so they’re on you. I’ve made NO additional price increases on my goods, fair value remains. My sincere hope is no extra surprises. Zonos estimates duty costs, so there *may* be small discrepancies, but they assure shippers it’s rare. This is all new to me. If your landed costs end up more than $10 US over what you paid and you paid FULL asking price, not an offer, please contact me with details and receipts. Again, please know this tariff situation is as frustrating for me as it may be for you! Thank you for understanding.