No box or manual, but this brilliant piece of kit is
new-new and unused!
Probably some dumb kid in Oklahoma* or somewhere bought it
but mistakenly thought he also had to get the N.I. Traktor software
in order to make
‘sick beats and drops’.
Hey you, kid from America!! The AMAZING!
DJ software is only $99 and it is so feature-rich that Richie Rich called asked asked to borrow some features.
Add this
practically new DJ controller, and for less than $200,
you have an INCREDIBLE! tool at your disposal.
PERFECTLY tuned to the software by NI, the
kings of pro digital audio since spacetime immemorial.
With the push of a button, you can change the controller to
midi mode.
You can
easily assign of all the Traktor Kontrol's knobs and buttons
to control anything you want.
So yeah, you could use this to
control tracks in Ableton,
a software plug-in, a physical synth, a mixer, a delay pedal,
et aliae ad nauseam... anything with MIDI!
The package also includes the
original overlay: one side is for a fully-featured sampler (I think).
One side of the overlay is blank so you can label your genius
custom preset that controls your live light show (yes, you can do easily do that with MIDI).
* Yes, we know most people in OK are NOT dumb, but KSO was born in
Texas Texas yee ha.
And while there are plenty of dumb rich kids in Oklahoma, there are plenty of
dumb rich kids in all the lower 48 buying brand new gear and then losing interest immediately and
sending the gear into space.
But the note clearly suggests an Oklahoman origin**, even though there are no specified guarantees in that regard.
Wherever it came from, we found it on the moon (NOT the Earth’s moon, a different moon***) in a big bottle with a handwritten note that said:
NI *#^$s & TxScX
—Tommy Brewster
**See, obvs from OK. But we changed the name to protect ourselves from getting sued by some rich jerk in OK.
We took umbrage at the note, obviously, and nearly smashed the
DJ controller with a
big black moon rock: different moon***, different kind of moon rocks.
***
‘Black Moon’, as it is known, is super cool (and warm) and no one even remembers the name of the planet it orbits because the planet ScX and no one goes there and Black Moon is known throughout the galaxy for its rugged natural beauty AND decadent comfort.
Black Moon (actually not 100% black) is cool-ish, with a distant, warm, red and orange-red sun all day. It’s cooler at night, but it is very comfortable day and night because nearly
everything is black and retains the heat well and everyone 'relaxes' in naturally formed, spring fed hot tubs all night anyway. Black Moon is widely regarded as one of the most beautiful places in our entire galaxy, and if you don’t believe
black is beautiful, then you obviously have not been to Black Moon or know any black people.
Anyhow we realized that smashing an
AMAZING! DJ Controller from
Native Instruments was silly, since there were lots of cool,
smart people on Earth and Oklahoma who might want to:
- Make people dance
- Make people chill out
- Play music in a bar, church, or roller rink
- Play songs and sound effects at a baseball game
Or
you could pretend to be:
- Kool Herc
- Grandmaster Flash
- Afika Bambaataa
- JamMaster Jay
- Newcleus
- DJ Shadow
- I dunno, Girl Talk? Does he even belong on this list? Prob not, but you could easily make fun mashups and then try to talk to girls.
You are 100% guaranteed impress the heck out of your friends who won't be able to stop dancing to
your sick beats and drops.
Even your synth friends will think you're some kind of mad scientist genius for using thing to
send midi control messages to control your modular synth rig.
—
Karl
