Weirdo Vintage Disco wearable percussion set new unused in original box Wearable Disco 1978 - Plastic

Ok so this box has remained unsold and unopened for almost 50 years. It is a time capsule. It is a TIME MACHINE back to when men were men but men smelled like horny rhinos and the world was in a MUCH SEXIER place than it is now. Back then you didn’t have THE INTERNET. your ONLY entertainment was strapping a couple shiny plastic shakers to your butt and going to a nightclub that smelled like wet Marlboros. THAT WAS IT! And you know what? It was BAD ASS. You didn’t need a dating APP to hook up. You just took a swig of gin, downed a benzo and waited to be ENVELOPED in someone’s smelly ass pheromones and be swept from the dance floor directly into somebody’s shag carpeted VAN that had been lovingly painted with an airbrush mural of a wizard riding a unicorn. THAT WAS THE PINNACLE OF ROMANCE. Sorry…I got a little off track there.

Anyway, these shakers have never been used and display well but here’s the thing…like Woody said in the cinematic classic Toy Story 2: “you can’t spend your whole life on a SHELF! YOU GOTTA GET YOURSELF PLAYED WITH!” These things NEED TO BE USED! Have a disco party and actually USE these things. Pull a Back to the Future and go back and make out with your own grandma as she dances to “Play That Funky Music White Boy”. Go change the past to change the future because THAT IS WHAT WE NEED RIGHT NOW! Bring SEXY BACK! Bring back hot pants and hairy chests! MAKE AMERICA HORNY AGAIN!